
Last week we viewed what was supposed to be the two premier semi-finals in world football. El Clasico Part III didn’t live up to the hype due to the shocking display of one of the teams (who actually played at home!!!) and in the other game the great German side looked more like a mid-table team (oh wait that is where they are in the Bundesliga). On Saturday there was controversy at Stamford Bridge and I am not going to go ballistic at the linesman as my team United get those decisions now and again…. Cast your mind back a few years and Pedro Mendes and Roy Carroll! Then on Sunday the linesman blatantly failed to spot two penalties. When did Serbia start playing volleyball and when has Michael Owen never won a penalty (if it was Steven Gerrard, Fat Frank or John “I sleep with teammates wives” Terry than it would have been a different story). So let’s see our nominations. If you feel I have left someone out then please make your comments below or let me know – colm@soccerbanter.org

Real Madrid – To enter into an El Clasico and act the way you do… DISGRACE! This should have been the showpiece of the season. Should have maybe been a final, thank goodness it wasn’t. You have a plethora of talent including Casillas, Marcello, Ozil and Ronaldo to name but a few and you roll on the ground, feign injury and generally cry to the referee on every challenge. Now you weren’t alone on this one. Barcelona was as guilty but you took the proverbial biscuit. Jose Mourinho is one of the best managers in the world and will probably become United manager one day, but please keep your negative tactics away from the Theatre of Dreams. Worth about $10 million (saves $20 million).

Francois Blaquart – Who said racism was a thing of the past? Well the technical director of the French Football Federation doesn’t think so. The academy at Clairefontaine has produced players of the caliber of Henry, Trezeguet, Ben Arfa, Saha, Gallas. All are French internationals and have brought some great success to France, including a World Cup. Blaquart this week was accused of limiting black and Arab players in national training programs. The players I have mentioned are all black players and without them France wouldn’t have been as successful (even with Henry’s handball). Zinedine Zidane is of Arab descent and is surely the best player France has ever produced. Surely if this was the benchmark for a player in 2000’s then why change? Well someone decided that there wasn’t enough racism in soccer, so he decided to add a little more. I think this boy will ultimately lose his job but I am sure there are people in cahoots with him and he is the scapegoat. Monsieur Blaquart welcome to the FETWW Hall of Fame (Shame in your case) – Worth $150,000 (saves $300,000).

VVV Venlo – Now this may be a publicity stunt of the highest order, but signing an 18 month old boy, has to be ridiculous. I know Scott Parker was in a McDonalds advertisement doing keep ups in his back yard. Since then he has had to work hard to get where he is but this is shocking. Okay, clubs are always looking for young talent, but surely this contravenes FIFA rules. Now this is the first time I have heard of this club and probably will be the last time. VVV Venlo, I think is our fourth nomination for Dutch football, not bad for a country that produced Cryuff, Neeskens, Van Basten, Gullit and Johnny Metgod!!!!! Worth about $1million a week (saves $2million).